A rough May

May is my favourite month.  5 years ago when Grant and I decided to start trying to have a baby we both agreed that a May baby would be perfect.  In May the year hits it's stride; the weather turns warm, the sun stays up later and later, gardens are planted, and summer looms wide open in front.  

This May however has been very rough.  It seems likes we've been taking one hit after another all month, I'm feeling buried under all the nastiness.  I'm trying hard to appreciate all the little things in life but some days I'm struggling to even do that.  

Sofia has been alternating between extremely adorable and difficult.  Please no "terrible two" talk, we are choosing to not buy into that.  When she is "on" she is amazing.  She started talking with sentences a few weeks ago and continues to dazzle us with new words and phrases daily.  She's really into dancing and at least once a day is starting 'dance parties' in the kitchen.  "Daddy this way.  Mama your turn.  Mama hold hands, Dada hold hands.  DANCE.  Spin."  During our dance breaks I can smile and laugh and love life.  

When she's "off" she uses the sentences and new phrases against us.  It's all a learning curve, Sofia is learning about rules and testing her boundaries.  Grant and I remain a united front and because of this we expect her 'pushing' to be short lived.  What has me worried is the attention seeking that has started this last week.  Sofia will do things that she knows are wrong to get attention while Grant and I are busy doing chores or preparing meals.  Lucky for us (and unlucky for Sofia) Grant and I are wise to her.  I was expecting this when the baby is born so this will give us a test run on how to deal with it.

There has been some high points to this month, we just spent a lovely weekend together on Salt Spring Island.  Sofia is still talking about "watch Dada pay hoccer" or "watching Dada play soccer" for those of you that don't speak Sofia.  Also Sofias speech is becoming clearer, if she is speaking carefully or quietly I have heard "L"s.  

Sofia is not the only junior Dybdal that has given me a reason to smile, the belly baby has been making itself increasingly known.  It is very active and moves around a lot.  Grant has been able to feel the movements for a couple of weeks now and I have seen my belly move a couple of times with the movements too.  This baby is getting bigger and becoming stronger.  On the weekend I was wearing a big fitting shirt and a stranger commented on me being pregnant.  That made me GRIN!

I'm now realizing that I need to regroup.  I need to clean my house, clean out my brain and turn things around.  I am thankful for all my blessings, I really do know what a lucky lady I am.  It's just sometimes the universe hands you more than you think you can handle.  I know that we will be on the other side of this crap and be just fine.  I'd just as soon be through it now rather than later.